


Dynamite!

by Gcgraywriter



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Based On A Sigrid Song, Cheating, Depression, Divorced Harry Potter & Ginny Weasley, F/M, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Infertility, Infidelity, No Ginny Bashing, POV Ginny Weasley, Quidditch Player Ginny Weasley, Separations, Sigrid - Freeform, Spell Damage, no Harry bashing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-17
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:06:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23698198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gcgraywriter/pseuds/Gcgraywriter
Summary: She sat in the empty living room as the silence filled her heart. She couldn’t cry any more, her tears had long since dried. The evening sun cast its last rays into the room like the last vestiges of their relationship. She heard a noise and half expected Harry to walk in. She had asked him to stay away; This would be easier if he stayed away.Linked to my Drarry Fic "All The Wrong Choices" This is Ginny's POV from her side of the divorce. No Ginny bashing, no Harry bashing. Just a sad little fic.
Relationships: Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley
Comments: 10
Kudos: 13





	Dynamite!

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [All the wrong choices - Currently being rewritten](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14213793) by [Gcgraywriter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gcgraywriter/pseuds/Gcgraywriter). 



> This fic was based on my other fic however whenever I heard this song I thought of Ginny and her side of the story. There are always two sides and I think it can be so easy to overlook the one in favour of the other. 
> 
> “Dynamite” by Sigrid  
> “Don’t know where I am with you  
> Forgetting time and space with you  
> Oh, I wish we had a common view  
> You see my red as blue  
> I don’t belong in your universe  
> For better or for worse  
> I’m the same, but I’m bolder  
> You’ll get home, but I’m on my way out now  
> Not the same destinations  
> I will stay when you get off the train  
> You’re as safe as a mountain  
> But know that I am dynamite  
> Oh, you’re as safe as a mountain  
> But know that I am dynamite  
> Your hand is warm but my heart is blue  
> Is blue now  
> I miss you, but I’ve got things to do  
> Oh, I wish we had a common view  
> You see my red as blue  
> I don’t belong in your universe  
> For better or for worse  
> I’m the same, but I’m bolder  
> You’ll get home, but I’m on my way out now  
> Not the same destinations  
> I will stay when you get off the train  
> You’re as safe as a mountain  
> But know that I am dynamite  
> Oh, you’re as safe as a mountain  
> But know that I am dynamite  
> Know that I am dynamite, now ooh  
> Oh know, know that I am dynamite  
> Know that I am dynamite  
> Oh, it’s so cold here  
> ‘Cause I left my heart to be with you  
> Oh, it’s so cold here  
> ‘Cause I left my heart to be with you  
> I’m the same, but I’m bolder  
> You’ll get home, but I’m on my way out now  
> Not the same destinations  
> Know I will stay when you get off the train  
> You’re as safe as a mountain  
> But know that I am dynamite  
> Oh oh, you’re as safe as a mountain  
> But know that I am dynamite.”

[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/187009200@N02/49784421077/in/dateposted-public/)

She sat in the empty living room as the silence filled her heart. She couldn’t cry any more, her tears had long since dried. The evening sun cast its last rays into the room like the last vestiges of their relationship. She heard a noise and half expected Harry to walk in. She had asked him to stay away; This would be easier if he stayed away. 

She picked up the picture of them on their wedding day and stroked the glass. They had looked so happy and hopeful as her dress and hair swirled in the wind. Their grins were so wide as they kissed surrounded by their friends and family. The cornfield of the burrow visible in the background. Golden like the golden boy. They had felt like they could conquer the world. They were wrong.

It started small, at first. Harry would disappear into his study after a long day at the ministry. Then he went to bed instead of waiting up for her after Quidditch practice. They missed meals together and let others take priority. 

On the outside, they put on a united front, but their foundations were crumbling from beneath their feet. They thought that maybe starting a family would rekindle the spark between them, and it did for a while as they tried to conceive. Candle-lit dinners waited for her when she returned home. She bought underwear to entice him into action. For a time, things seemed almost back to normal- when she didn’t look too closely. 

After a year of trying, fear started to set in. Ginny had always wanted a large family like her own. A house filled with noise and laughter and love. But with every passing month, that dream seemed to move further out of her grasp. Her mother tried to calm her mind as she told stories of her own experiences, but how could that help her when she couldn’t even have one child? She grew angry at the universe. How could it do this to her after everything she had been through?

After another year, they decided to seek help. She remembered the office like it was yesterday. Dark wood and books everywhere, it felt more like a library than a healers office. But the moment the words were set loose into the air, it was like she descended into a vacuum. Sound and touch lost all importance. She was damaged, one too many brushes with death had destroyed her. Curse damage couldn’t be healed. 

She had raged at the London sky that night as she hovered above the clouds on her broom. More than once, she considered throwing herself off and smashing herself into oblivion, just like her heart. Her hands were virtually frozen when she returned to the ground three hours later. Harry was nowhere to be found. Nowhere to fill the emptiness in her soul as she sat in the quiet kitchen alone with her thunderous thoughts. Her loud Gryffindor roar at the sky became a silence simmering anger that was always so close to the surface. She was alone as she had been in that chamber as her life was leeched away from her. 

She slammed her hands down on the marble worktop and vowed to herself that this wasn’t the person she was meant to be. She didn’t want people to be burned by her touch as the fire lashed out. She called the only person she could think of to help. Oliver answered her floo call after a short delay, his voice thick with sleep and his hair mused beyond recognition. However, at the first mention of Quidditch, his eyes were bright, and his interest, keen. She could always rely on him when Quidditch was involved. 

He managed to get her a try out for the Harpies, and she got the job, her fearlessness and anger serving her well on the pitch. Gwenog was impressed as were her new teammates. If she couldn’t make a name for herself in her marriage then she would make it for herself elsewhere, one that would blaze through peoples memories. 

Harry quit his job. 

Again she raged silently to herself as Harry fell into a stupor. She tried, at first to coax him out of it, to encourage him to do something instead of wallowing away in his study. Some nights he didn’t come out at all. Ginny knew he was struggling, but so was she and he hadn’t been there for her. He had never really been there for her. He had pushed through life, doing what was expected by so many. It was as though he had lost any sense of purpose and any interest in finding a new one. 

As life at home got worse, being at work got better. The Harpies were destroying their opponents and were dominating headlines. A dark-haired photographer always managed to capture her good side, but then she always saved her best smiles for him. 

It had been so long since she had been held, that her skin practically ached with need when he asked for an interview. She gave him the best interview of his life, inside and out as he made her feel loved again. She wanted to feel guilty when she returned home. Wanted to feel regret when she caught sight of Harry’s birdnest hair but couldn’t. 

She thought about leaving but couldn’t, this was her life too. Why should she give up everything, hadn’t she already? Harry was safe and almost everything she knew. But she was dynamite ready to blow, her fuse already lit. 

Ginny knew she had to blow her world up and rise like a phoenix from the ashes. And she’d be damned if she cared what happened in the aftermath. She needed it all to burn and melt and crumble, the way she had on the inside. 

She made sure they were somewhere Harry would find them. Waited as the door creaked open and caught him as he stood watching them together. She waited for the fury, the shouting, the pain. But nothing came. The numbness seemed endless as he turned and left them to continue. They stopped as the photographer scurried away. 

She walked into the kitchen, where he sat waiting. Again she waited for the passion and the anger, but he sat there with dead eyes. The silence seemed to thicken like porridge around them. Who knew that the sound of the world falling apart was like the thick snows in deepest winter? 

Divorce is a dirty word. It suggests blame and failure. He took the responsibility, all of it, shielding her from the public backlash. He proved that he had always been there for her, she just hadn’t been able to see it all the time. 

He was damaged too, destroyed by too many brushes with death. Because curse damage can’t be healed. She had been too angry to appreciate it at the time. 

She moved to the kitchen and gave it a final look over as the dust motes swirled in the sunbeam. She took the photo and put it in the box along with all the other things which were hers. She almost wanted him to come home, beg her to stay. She longed for the passion he had once shown her but knew that he would remain true to his world and would stay away. If there was one thing she could always rely on, it was Harry keeping his word. 

She gave the room one last look around, noting the things that were left. She realised that they had both been walking the same road, but their destinations had always been different. They belonged in separate universes, and it had taken them this long to realise. She felt a final tear slide down her cheek as she turned and left through the floo. She was wrong. Maybe she had a few tears left.


End file.
